CrossFit – MentalMonday: When am I good enough for competition Mentalwod | mentaltraining for CrossFit

I have my first Crossfit competition this Saturday and to be honest, I am freaking out….There are so many things that I am not capable of doing or not capable of doing them fast enough that I feel totally crushed psychologically and moving backwards rather than forward….So, naturally, I started searching for a help in all mightly internet and stumbled upon Mentalwod website. There are many great articles and one phrase that helps me right now: ÈIt’s not who you are that holds you back, it’s who you think you’re not.

There is the great article about getting ready for competition that you can find below, using the link 🙂


via CrossFit – MentalMonday: When am I good enough for competition Mentalwod | mentaltraining for CrossFit.


Book review: ¨Beauty junkies. Inside our $15billion obsession with cosmetic surgery¨


Last month I read a book of Alex Kuczynski about plastic surgeries and the obsession with that. The author is a journalist, so she is not only giving her personal perspective towards cosmetic surgeries, but also provide some data and valuable information as well as introducing us to the history of plastic surgery. Author herself is a beauty junkie and she raised a question where is the line between being beauty junkie that can`t live without plastic surgeries and taking care of yourself. She even went that far once that offered her mom to get some botox, because she has too many wrinkles. Since when having wrinkles is a bad thing? There are so many different sides of cosmetic surgery: wrinkle fillers, such as botox is one of the most common ones, boob job, teeth job, nose job, fat removal, face lift, lip fillers and list goes on insanely. So, what is beautiful?  Quting the book:

¨There are so many ways to make beauty into political issue and a point of debate as there are definitions of what is beautiful. On a personal level, symmetrical faces, bright white teeth, good physical carriage are things that matter. Additionally, our lack of self-consciousness, an unawareness of our looks, plays a large role in other`s perception of our beauty and always was. In 1500s Baldassare Castiglione whore his etiquette manual Book of Courtier that a beautiful woman appears beautiful only if it is clear that she is not seeking approval for her beauty, if her ¨gestures are simple and natural, without working at being beautiful.¨ «…» We embrace the extreme procedures that we believe will make us beautiful, that will detonate desire in others. On long Island, New York, girls graduating from high school receive gifts of breast implants from their parents. In China, on the island of hainan, patients check into 12,000-square-foot plastic surgery hospital called Dreaming Girl`s Fantasy for extensive head-to-toe cosmetic reworking. In Beijing, women from all over China compete in the Miss Plastic Surgery competition¨.

So this is the world that we live in. The author herself had fat removal from her thights that she later on regretted because of all the pain and complication and  she admitted to herself that she just had to go for a running one hour every day for a month and all the fat would have been gone. So, maybe before making any enhancements to the body is simply better to think and stop of what can be done without laying on surgical table. And even if nothing can be done, maybe, just maybe it is just the way it is supposed to be, because we were born this way. I do not promote laziness and not taking care of yourself, I am just saying that there is no point of going into extremities with your body, because there always will be someone around looking better that you, no matter how hard you will try, because the grass is always greener on the other side.

So, for a conclusion, I do recommend reading this book, just because it is always useful to expand your point of view and it is an easy read that does not require too much attention.

God Bless America movie and What Would You Do

Yesterday Keven had some new ideas of what we could watch as we both were having our days off and simply wanted to spent time not doing that much outside but staying together. Well, we ended up going quite early in the morning for food shopping and then to check out the dog park with Nora as we try to socialize her as much as possible before she turns 5 months and the dog become more guided by habits than by exploration 🙂

Anyhow, when we came back, we were watching some episodes on youtube of what would you do that were touching different social situations and dilemmas whether someone should get engaged in the situation that took place. And it is shocking to see how many people are being ignorant of what is happening around them and at the same time we were really touched by other people sensitivity and good will. This raises a question where is the line between minding your own business and being a good citizen that cares about other human beings. The story that brought tears in my eyes was actually the situation where a lesbian couple comes to restaurant with two kids and the waitress is being very impolite and rude. One guy wrote to the couple such a touching note that it was impossible not to get touched by the sensitivity of this guy. It shows that sometimes we actually don’t know where we can get support and who will be the ones that will help us. To be honest, this guy did not look that much as he would be caring about other people and here you go, it only shows how judgemental anyone can be, including myself. I always try to overcome this stigma of being judgemental about other people, but from time to time I do fall into this gap. I definitely recommend checking all the different situations of What Would You do and reflect on how you would act yourself. I definitely helps to evaluate what are your values and what you consider to be important in your life.

Then at night we decided to watch some movie and Keven suggested to watch “God Bless America”, so we watched it. The beginning was really good and as I love sarcasm, I really enjoyed it, but then more and more my attention was drifting away from the movie. Why? Well, because all of us always think that we are better than others, by others I mean anyone. We are better than our neighbour, because he….(insert yourself), we are better than our relatives, because we (insert again 🙂 ). Don’t get me wrong, I am not judging, because I act like that sometimes, but you know what? Everyone, I mean everyone always think that they are better than someone else. Keven is working in a place where drunk people can come and spend a night and most of people that come there are really low class people, but even they think that they are better than their neighbour or relative, because….So, it was the same with this movie…The guy decides to kill the reality show star, because she reflects how degraded the society is and how shallow the values are and how much people are not able anymore to have an authentic conversation and because his own life is going downhill and he thinks that he is gonna die anyway from brain cancer. Eventually he did not kill himself and ended up killing all “empty and shallow and disrespectful” people together with teenage girl. What’s the moral? I don’t know. I just know that anyways, watching them exploding brains of other people was no fun and that this leads nowhere. So, then it got me back to the series of “What would you do” and got me thinking about society and about values. Yes, I do agree that our society is very materialistic and that I myself sometimes am very judgemental, because I don’t find value in cars and jewelry and any other signs of wealth. But, on the other hand, if it makes people happy, why should I care what values do they have, but then I start wondering if they were thinking about values that they have or they just accepted the value system offered them by mass media. If the values are not authentic and just copy cat of what fashion offers, shouldn’t I try to talk and see whether they can evoke their own thinking. So, the hero of the movie, chose simply to kill those that do not share the same value system with him and is rather opposite from his own. But then again, what is worse? Being shallow or being killer?

Why I work out and eat clean

I love working out, I am in no way professional but I like pushing limits of my body. Sometimes I do refer to my body as if it would be something outside me:) I say: “my body needs to work out” and it’s true. Sometimes my mind does not feel like working out, but my body is pushing me yo make at least something. I have to do some type of workout every day, even if it would be walking few kilometers. Anything counts. I do work out not because I would look hotter or more attractive ( my husband finds me beautiful all the time) but because I feel good. I always tend to have at leat two different physical activities at a time, to provide myself mental stimulation and variety. When I was a kid, I used to do swimming (5 times a week) and karate (3 times a week) so my body is used to be under pressure. Then I had period of around 8 years where I was not working out regularly, except physical education classes at school. I still would be in shape. It was not until I started getting really chubby that I decided tk stopall this and get back in shape. I got strong body, so it is a sin not to use it. I started running, swimming and my kilograms melted. Then my ex introduced me to rock climbing. It was love from the first sight. Boyfriend was gone, climbing stayed. It is amazing how much it pushes you mentally and physically – you are never strong enough. Rocks are always stronger than you. And when you think…isn’t it crazy that we climb those rocks that have been there fkr millions of years and feel sense of accomplishent when we top it. Rock doesn’t care…but we do…not just for personal accomplish, but for the connection with nature. Most of my most beautiful moments in life are related to rock climbing: travelling, exploring, being absolutely fulfilled and totally content, feeling happy to be alive and have an opportunity to feel and experience, happy to have this body that can climb, being able to enjoy sun burning my back, taking a moment to look around and enjoy beauty of nature, feeling glad that I fight my inner demons and fears, meeting most amazing people and making friends for life. Since I started to climb, I never got back into state of not working out. I also started doing capoeira (brazilian martial art). Most of the days after work I would go to climb for an hour, then head directly to capoeira for the other hour and go by bike home. After that I would feel so weak and strong at the same time. I love being able to explore possibilities of my body, to make it stronger and stronger. I could not find affordable capoeira group in quebec, so I just stuck with climbing and working out at home ( and some apps). Then I discovered Crossfit, thanks to Couchsurfers from Washington. That was another love from first sight. I feel challenged every time and I love it. I never worked out with weights in my life, so it is all new to me. But climbing helps a lot: I have super strong back, forearms and fingers, great sense o balance and ability to push myself, and pain endurance ( try to climb wog shoes that are 3 size smaller or hold your body weight on 0.3cm edge and pull up), so I am doing quite great in crossfit.

Around the same time when I started crossfit I also discovered Zone Diet, while I was browsing for some recipe book. So, I decided to take a month clallenge with Zone. That was great, I eliminated gluten and changed my way of eating hy having much less carbs. I was reading a lot about nutrition and more and more I felt inclined towards paleo. I took little steps, trying to understand why we eat as we eat finally took Whole30 challenge. Just went cold turkey. It was challenging at the beginning, but I would never go back to my previous eating. I love my body and I want it to be as healthy as possible. I rlrat quality food and I can’t even think of eating something that contains sth that I can’t pronounce or that is not natural. I want to be able to climb when I will be 70, I want my children to be healthy and I love to be in charge of what I eat and how I look. There is no greater feeling as feeling healthy and strong. It requires effort and is not always easy, but what is? In order to be happy we have to work to achieve it, it is a process and it requires effort, but show me a person who doesn’t want to be happy and healthy, just not everyone is ready to work for it. But this is personal choice and responsibility for your own life and way of living.

Saturday morning Education

You know what is great about all the social media? That you end up exposed to things that you maybe would not have seen. This morning, I made my morning smoothie and coffee, sat in front of computer and checked my FB. I am lucky to know people from all walks of life and this time my attention was caught by link posted by a friend from my times in university where I was studying philosophy. Not only it is a great video and very nicely done, it also brought many memories as I highly respect Spinoza and his way of thinking and he was first philosopher that I wrote a paper on that appeared to be in philosophical conference. So, this video brought back all the memories of analyzing some part of Spinoza “Ethics” and going through the proofs of existence of God and how much into it I was. Sometimes I wish to go back to study, I still feel great need for intellectual stimulation, but at the same time I know that even though I have a great capacity for analyzing, I am not that much of creative type and probably would never end up being a creative thinker. So, I don’t think that academic career would be best option for me, however, I can tell you that I utterly enjoyed my years of studying and being buried among the books 🙂