My learning project

right…so, I was laying in the bed and thinking about today if I had learned something as I promised myself to learn and I suddenly realized that I did, even if I did not make myself to fixate it and even if every day I do not write down what I learned though I should. So, today I learned how to crochet had with earflaps.  I wanted to have one and I disliked the one that I made before so I remade it. Yesterday I was working with kids and it means waking up really early, going with bus for an hour and spending nine ours with two toddlers who are adorable but as I am learning to deal with them, requires immense amount of energy. So, sometimes I just feel like watching TV shows (my sin) and I have been watching “Parenthood” ( somewhat I justify it as kind of educational for my nanny job (this is one more project of mine, I just can’t imagine having children without having experience, so while I am waiting for the results from universities and can’t work officially I decided to gain this type of experience)). However, I always feel a bit bad when I am watching TV shows, so normally I either workout or do some mechanical crafts. Today it was crocheting a hat 🙂

 

I found the pattern online, it was called Peruvian earflap hat. I think it came out quite nice and I hope that I will be wearing it quite a lot  🙂

So, I was reflecting back what else I have been learning recently and probably it would be children psychology. Since I got this job with two girls of 16 months and 2,5 years, I have been learning a lot about toddler psychology, then learning to apply it practically. The girls are french, so I have been learning french constantly, because there is no escape with english. I am not surprised that after working day I am exhausted, because it is constant pressure from learning perspective. I love it though. It just shows that every experience in life is useful and, to be honest, I never actually thought that I would be able to babysit someone in my life. There is so much learning in their life of the abilities that we take for granted that it astonishes me and I try to help their development as much as I can. Once we have something in our automatic memory, we don’t think anymore how to use utensils, how to use toilet, how to jump, how to roll, how to recognize shapes and colors, how to draw a line, or a circle, how to express ourselves, how to dress ourselves, how to undress ourselves, how to walk, how to climb up and down the stair, how to feel music and dance, how to dance, how to hold the pencil and so much more. So, I am learning with them, I learn to appreciate again what I already know how to do and I feel happy for every progress that they make .

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Inspiration

“The truest mark of being born with great qualities is to be born without envy

Francois, Duc de la Rochefoucauld

You know it is so true…..I don’t know myself many people who live without envy and I definitely do not have a golden star for that. I try to eliminate any possible track of it, but I think I still have some left. At least I eliminated the need to compare myself to others. However, Imagine how wonderful it is not to have envy, I am sure that those people is so much more happier. First of all, it brings satisfaction with what you have. Obviously someone can defend this and say that people who are satisfied with what they have are not ambitious, because they do not strive for more. But at the end of the day, what does it matter? The only thing that will be important is whether you were happy in your life or not. I do not think that not feeling envy makes you passive in life 🙂 And it eliminates the other most important thing: comparison to the others. Instead of comparing all the time yourself to the other, you simply enjoy the success of the others and enjoy your own life. Isn’t that what it is all about? There always will be someone who will have “more” than you…It is like being in constant race for the horizon that can never be reached. There always will be someone more successful, someone having more money, someone having less money, someone having more responsibilities, someone having less responsibilities, someone looking better, someone looking less that good, someone having children, someone without children and so on. List is endless, it is just the thing that comparison to the others and building your life goals and satisfaction on such comparison leads eventually into dissatisfaction, because you can never be someone else.

On Asking for Help

Help Point

It might seem weird but I don't like asking help in general. I just like doing everything by myself and I like learning things. I hate asking money. I think I asked someone to lend me money maybe once or twice in my life that would be longer period than couple hours or days. Probably I consider it failure not to be able to manage finances so that you would not have to ask someone else to help you…So, probably even if I would be short of money I don't know if I would ask someone to help me with that. It would be really hard psychologically to admit that I need such sort of help. Other than that, I don't see problems asking for help, but as I mentioned, I prefer doing things myself. The reason for that it because I don not like to disturb people unless it is really important and problem could not be solved. I admit that probably I do not like myself to be asked for the things that other person could do himself, so I try not to do that to others. I really dislike people asking me question even before they try to think of the answer or saying that they can't do something before trying to do it. Sometimes I come out as being arrogant, but I believe that the more you can do yourself the better prepared you are for whatever situations might come in your life and, at the same time, the better prepared you would be to help the others. Probably it could be called unselfish selfishness.

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True rules of happiness

I have a “Happiness project” calendar where each day you have something new written down…And somehow I forgot to takes of the pages from last few days, so I got quite few new ideas at the same time.

There is really nice one: “You can choose what you do; You can’t choose what you like to do”.

It is so true when you just think about it. I would like to like many things….I would like to enjoy art much more, but I don’t go to galleries and concerts, because I don’t like going. Keven would love to like wine, he thinks it is amazing to like wine, but he really does not like it, even though he would love to like it. There are so many things that seems so wonderful to be liked, but at the same time we know that we will never like them even if it looks awesome to like them…

The other one: “The absence of feeling bad isn’t enough to make you feel happy; you must strive to find sources of feeling good“.

I don’t remember who said that the best source of feeling good is nature beauty. I don’t think that I have ever felt in my life more happy than capturing the beauty of nature. It can happen anywhere, at any time. Just walking around, lifting your head, inhaling and suddenly feeling unexplainable happy just being able to feel alive and feel it. It happens to me sometimes when I walk, I just feel happy that I can feel that I have the privilege to enjoy this beauty. And you know what? Just the realization of that feeling of happiness makes me feel even more happy, just because I am still able to feel it. The other source of me feeling good is my relationship, my marriage…Just looking at Keven makes me feel so happy, I can’t even explain, it is just feeling that overwhelms me by its power. I don’t say that I feel that every day, however, it happens pretty often and I am happy that I feel it and it just proves me that he really is love of my life. That realization once again makes me feel happy. I also find a source of feeling good when I work out or when I climb or do any intensive physical activity. It makes me feel good first of all because it brings positive energy and second of all, because it shows me the privilege of being able to enjoy my body and being able to push my limits. I am just happy that I can do that.

I believe that being able to identify the sources of feeling good already allows you to feel good. Of course, there might be days when it seems that nothing can make you feel good, so if in such moments you do have a list of the things that made you feel good in the past it should by itself already mitigate the feeling bad.


Telling It Like It Is

Everything depends on the situation. I am a person that usually would tell as it is, but I learned that sometimes truth is not necessary and can hurt people. Anyways, it even brings up a philosophical question…What is truth? For instance, if I think that a dress is not fitting my friend, is it truth? I believe that this is just my perception that is subjective. Imagine in the same scenario that there is other person in the room and that person tells, that the dress look very nice. Is he telling the truth? you don’t know. He might be telling the truth, which in this sense would be expressing his subjective view honestly, or he might be lying by covering up his subjective truth. If he is being honest, then you have two truths that are equally valid and none of them has more weight. This is then for the person to decide which truth she find more acceptable. So, telling like not is is really tricky thing, because even if you think that you are right, actually, you are right just in the realm of your subjectivity that might be totally not reflecting reality. So, in such position it is better to hold your tongue unless you know that you opinion make positive outcome. I could develop this further, but I don’t think that someone would be really interested :))))

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On Acting My Age. What does that mean?

 

Do I act on my age? Actually, I don’t know what that would mean. I act as I feel would be best for me. Would it be similar to what other people of my age do? Definitely not majority, however I don’t think I would be unique. I just like experiencing things differently. I stopped drinking my moms milk too early, i started walking too early, I started going to school at the age of 5, i was skipping classes, I dropped out of high school couple month before final exams and graduation and went to hitch-hike around europe at the age of 18. At 20 I studied in 2 universities simultaniously: law and philosophy, because I wanted to see my limits, at 21 I also started working part time in marketing, willing to push my limits even more. Then I graduated, kept working in marketing related area. Dropped everything after couple years and went to volunteer in farm in Italy and Spain for few months. Moved to live in BArcelona and worked in various jobs, like bars, hostels, pub crawls, because wanted to experience that. After couple years moved to Canada, try to enter to do MA and Phd and while waiting for results and immigration papers, started learning french and working as a nanny. If I Plan to have children, better get experience before. Am I acting by my age? I don’t know. I just keep following myself and my sometimes crazy life projects…Life is a gift, I just try to use it as much as I can and try not to forget this simple fact…

Creating Traditions

I like traditions…probably in every family you have some kind of traditions. As we recently moved to new city, I also try to create some small traditions….Like, every Sunday we have “Sunday Breakfast” with friend at our home. Usually we would have pancakes, but each time we would try something different….I learned how to make dulce de lecce, because my friend mentioned it and it brought me memories from my travelling in Brazil, so I though it would be nice to include that into our breakfast. I did not buy it, because I like learning how to make things and I used the traditional method, rather than condensed milk method :)))) Today we were having blueberry and apple pancakes with blueberry sauce. It is more about meeting at least once a week and spending time together. After that usually we go for some rock climbing :))))

Me and Keven also have Friday pizza tradition. We would either have a pre made one or we would make our own and accompany it with some nice movie or TV show.

Back in my country, Lithuania, I also had some traditions with my friends, for instance, me and my flatmate would go every sunday afternoon to read in a coffee shop in the old town of Vilnius. We would either take our own books or browse in the shelves there to find something to read. I believe it is nice tradition as a way to spend time together and also spend it doing something for what you maybe would not have time during the week. It is so relaxing to sip coffee with a good book in your hands 🙂

With other group of my friend I was establishing tradition to meet once a month to learn something. Someone would prepare a little bit before and would introduce a skill to others. So, we were learning how to make sushi, how to play poker, how to juggle, how to make public speaking….So, my idea with this project was that in a year we would learn 12 new things that maybe we would not learn otherwise. I just love learning, for me as long as I am learning and can apply it one day, I am happy. It is the same with my jobs, as long I am learning and moving forward, I really enjoy it and put a lot of effort, but if it become too automatized and my brains do not get enough challenge, I start feeling trapped and dull.

Anyways, I think that traditions bring stability and let us create some valuable memories and experiences in our lives. I don’t think that it is easy to start tradition, it is even harder to continue doing that, but I think that reward is definitely worth putting an effort.

I wonder what are the traditions that other people have and that they find significant and important to follow.

 

Finding Job in Barcelona

I wrote this little article some time ago, but I decided to post it here, maybe someone will find it useful 🙂 Plus, it is nice to remember the times there….I would not go back right now, but I am sure that we will be back at least for half a year at some period in our lives.

And so…yesterday Vida got her first job in Barcelona. She will be working in an irish pub pretty close from home as a bartender. the salary is pretty good – 6 euros per hour and she will be working 5 hours per day. however, for her it was a pretty shock as she is carrier oriented, so she was hoping straight away to find job in her area and start making a carrier. but in Barcelona usually it is not working that ways, unless you are spanish, french or at least very qualified native english speaker. I remember, when I came to Barcelona I lost any illusion  to find job as a project manager, especially not knowing spanish language. And even though I consider to have almost perfect English, it is not helping either. So, what do expats usually do in Barcelona:

Job number one: teaching English, that is what Milli is doing. She is earning pretty good money, around 10-20euros per hour, depending where she is teaching. The only difficult thing is to get enough hours to make living, but once you are on the track, everything is pretty fine.

Job number two: working with sales over phone. Luckily I did not have to do this type of job as I simply hate phone and can’t imagine myself selling something.

Job number three: working in a pub, restaurant, hostel, hotel. I tried some  of it, working in a restaurant and now I work in a hostel. There might be pretty hard and pretty easy jobs, depending where you find it and depending on the owners. Luckily, my current job is amazing and I am proud of working in ecological hostel, so even though it is not what I want to do for rest of my life, I am really satisfied with it, plus I satisfy my urge for ethical job.

Job number four: working with promotion. I have done it myself, it is amazing how many clubs are needed to be promoted and how many promoters you can find around beach are and Las Ramblas. Club, pubs, coctail bars, restaurants, pub crawls, flamenco shows. So, if you will ever come to Barcelona, search for flyer people, at least you will get discount for entrance, maybe free entrance, maybe some little extras…

And for sure there are much more…just need to search and believe. Some people find it really easy, some harder. But if you want to experience the vibrant energy of barcelona, give a try 🙂

Barcelona

Image by zkvrev via Flickr

Spread your love

Some time ago via couchsurfing website  I found out about an initiative, called Korakor and their goal is to spread love around the world…they do many projects, but the one that is the most easy one is called Making love carpet…check their website. Even Couchsurfing project actually is about sharing and opening yourself to the others. First I participated in Hospitality Club project, but CS is much more user friendly and open. I had so many great experiences through this website and I still use it. I should receive couch surfers at the beginning of February. Just it is sad that sometimes people mix it with free accommodation and they don’t understand the main idea about sharing knowledge and experiences. Too often I receive copy-paste request from people who don’t even bother to write my name or mention anything that would connect us. I don’t expect a huge letter, but simple things would make it easy. However, I have met one of the most wonderful people in my life through Couchsurfing and a lot of new things came in my life trough this experience and I could not be more grateful.

It is amazing how many beautiful initiatives there are around the world that help us to realize that we live here and now, for instance, free hugs campaign, raising money for helping the others…there are so many websites that help you to raise money for the cause….even the hostel where I was working back in Barcelona is doing charity project …

I am happy to live in the world where we care about the others and most importantly I am happy to realize that 🙂